This week I moved to South Beach Phase 4

This is my own phase - aka "Oooh, there are doughnuts in the kitchen!" It's been a sugary-snacky week, and I felt tired and bloated all week, and got on the scale this morning and just about died at the horrifying number before my pudgy sugar-glazed eyes. And I realized that I've been practicing a creative form of weight loss sabotage - indulging myself for my virtuous exercise, I've stalled and now am moving backward on the weight loss. I go to the gym, I am definitely more toned and my clothes are fitting better - so I let my eating habits wander all over the map. I allow myself indulgences because I feel so virtuous after a good workout. And muscle does weigh more than fat, right? So I've been rearranging my body mass, substituting muscle for pure flab, but the flab isn't going anywhere without paying attention to my diet as well. And I've been decidedly half-assed about that. My motivation has been half-assed, that is, my ass is definitely full-assed.

It's the Fantasy of Youth - the idea that I can still eat like a 20something as long as I exercise like one. It just doesn't work this way in your 40s. My daughter has lost weight steadily since coming home from Tally and joining the gym, her early 20something metabolism has responded to regular workouts just like mine used to at her age. My body is responding well to the exercise, but my metabolism isn't firing up and burning fat like it once did.

So today I take the pledge - no beer, no pizza, no sneaking chcolate here and there, only SB-approved snacks at the office, portion control, etc., until my birthday 10 days from now. Gym 5x a week. That should be enough to undo the damage and maybe get a bit ahead.

Oh, and the doughnuts were very tasty, but gave me a stomachache by yesterday afternoon. Not worth it. I feel better when I don't eat that stuff - I love the way it tastes, who doesn't? - but I pay the price in lack of energy, fuzzy thinking, bloating and general malaise. It's just not worth it.

Back to ripping that crocheted bag. I still like the concept, but I definitely want to do small and subtle stripes, not big bold ones. Then it's time to shower and pack my healthy little SB lunch for the office....