Friday, November 03, 2006

All I can think about this Ted Haggard story

is what kind of spectacular dumbass IS this man? Even dumber than Mark Foley, and I thought he was a hopeless arrogant moron. But Haggard doesn't even know enough to leap into the Rehab Repentance! If he'd denied the sex but copped to the meth he might have been able to buy off the most gullible of his flock, but he went for it all - he triumphed over the sin of meth by paying for it and then throwing it away, and "did not have sex with that woman!" - just a "massage." Oookaaay....

Let's listen for the shrieking howler monkeys of the right wing on this one, mocking him...anybody hear anything yet? Me neither.

Let's test his story. Let's take out the delicious ingredients of stinkin' rich politically connected Republican televangelist with megachurch who is at the forefront of the anti-gay marriage issue, and just get to the meat, if you'll pardon the expression.

You are just you. You aren't rich or famous or anything, but you have a spouse. Imagine for a minute you get a phone call from a hooker telling you s/he has been doing your spouse for three years. And the hooker tells you that for the past three years, your spouse has been calling once a month, and has purchased meth to improve the experience.

And you confront your spouse, and your spouse at first indignantly denies all, and then says, "Oh honey, I'm sorry, I have to confess: I did buy meth from this person! But I threw it away, and all he/she gave me was a massage! And it was just one time! Honest!" And then the hooker says, "Oh, but I saved the voicemails!"

I mean, damn, even without the voicemails that are evidence of multiple meth purchases, how big an idiot would you have to be to buy a story that lame? He is not claiming not to know the guy. He's not denying buying the drug. And he's not even denying physical contact with the guy! The sheer arrogance, the inherent contempt for his flock in this, that he thinks they will swallow (you should pardon the expression) this lameass bullshit story - it's really sad. It's just sad.

Okay, so you're telling me you bought meth from a hooker, then threw it away and did not have sex with the hooker? Yeah. Okay. Then you called again to get more meth, so you could...do what, exactly? Triumph over sin again? And you met this hooker HOW, exactly? And got this hooker's phone number and called again?

Accused pastor admits he bought meth

This is the difference between evangelical preachers and politicians - the preachers are even more arrogant. He could have cried, claimed a drug habit he didn't have and joined Mark Foley in "rehab," to emerge "repentant" and "healed" and perhaps a bit smarter about leaving voicemail for hookers requesting more drugs.

It's so sad. The kind of sad that makes me giggle all day. It's even better when you read the stories about how this guy had a hotline to the Bush White House.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

you are dead on, and I LOVE it!

Anonymous said...

I agree 100 percent with you. This gives us an even better look into the kind of person Bush and his folks are.
M in NC.