It's October!

October's horoscope looks pretty good.

And once again I'm sharing similar weird feeling-things with a fellow Cancerian. Different lives, different circumstances, and my book still exists only in my head, as a guilty "I am bad and lazy for not focusing," thing, but boy, she summed up a lot of other feelings. My period of unemployment has been so good for me. After the insanity of the last decade, I really needed to step off the commute and the corporate and give myself a little time to figure out what the hell I'm doing with my life. And I found new goals, and I'm so excited about making the move I talked about for Four Freaking Years.

The weather here has finally changed for the better. The humidity has dropped a lot, the mornings are hovering around 68 degrees, which, after waking up for months to 77 degrees and 97% humidity, feels like heaven! I slept much better last night, and woke up energized and ready to tackle the world. I rode my bike, then went into the garage and continued to clean and pretty up that space. After an honest morning of exercise and sweat, I rewarded myself with an afternoon on my couch, knitting. It's so nice to be done with the contractor.

I'm afraid Boris is going to have to be put to sleep soon. He emerges from the garage to eat, but he's basically lost control of his bladder, and is now living in the garage and peeing ON MY DRYER. Seriously. Two clean litterboxes a few feet away. His urine isn't like normal cat urine, which is the only thing that makes it bearable - I find a lake of very pale yellow, odorless water, mop it up with paper towels, and two hours later, yes, there's another one. This cannot continue. I'm feeling sad and guilty already, that I "should have done more" - though I know that's irrational and stupid and false - I could keep a shrink busy for years with my issues about all the people (and animals) lost in the last decade, and now another one. I keep hoping he'll just die in his sleep one night, so I don't have to put him in the carrier for that last ride. I know that's not fair to him - the kinder thing to do would be to get it over with, but I'm just not mentally ready, and then he sits on the coffee table to intimidate me into feeding him dinner early, and I'm REALLY not ready. I wish they could talk. I want him to tell me it's time, and he's sending mixed messages. Every time I think it's time to just deal with this, he revives and stands in front of me, purring and demanding food. But still, the trend is obviously downhill, and fast.

Next week the nice man from United Van Lines will come back and drop off my boxes for the things I'll be packing myself. I've asked them to do the lamps and the televisions, but I can do the rest. I'd rather get it done over the next 2/3 weeks before the wedding, sort through things to donate and toss, label the boxes as to my own priorities, etc. By the time the wedding weekend rolls around this place will be boxed up and ready to roll, except for the things I actually need to use to live every day.

I need to have it all wrapped up before the wedding, because the timeline is tight. The wedding is Nov. 7th. Boy and family will roll in the day before, and stay through the Harry Potter visit on the 8th. The moving van will roll in on the 12th, and my lease begins on the 15th, which is a Monday. So my tentative game plan is to sleep here on an air mattress the night of the 12th, give the place a good final cleaning on the 13th, spend the night of the 13th either here or at Cousin C's, depending on how much last minute stuff I have to do. Then spend the night of the 14th at C's, and get up the next morning and drive the 6-7 hours from her house to AVL, and get there mid-afternoon, snag my keys from the office and camp in the new place, waiting for the movers on the 16th. That's the game plan - and I really don't see a reason why it can't go that smoothly. :-) I'm so excited - it's really real, and I'm really doing this!!